De - stressing as opposed to distressing.

Think about it -

Act on it -

Now -

Live it everyday.

He will be called .....

Wonderful, Counselor, Mighty God, Prince of Peace, Everlasting Father.

His name will be Jesus. 

(and the joke for the weekend - Baby Jesus was a Roman - because little Roman Davis had the part of Jesus for Jones Chapel's choir presentation of the Christmas story this weekend)

He was perfectly suited for the performances too. 

Smiling and reaching for his beautiful mama at seemingly appropriate times. 

Just beautiful.

As we sang to the baby in the Manger, I found myself really seeing the story fresh again.

I'm in a very reflective place today. 

God is moving in ways many of us can see right now. 

Leaving me.......

much as those shepherds in the fields.

completely amazed. 

I've made huge changes in my life this year.

Decisions that have been painful for me. 

Decisions that were painful for some around me.

I've worked diligently to get some major things settled. 

To progress in forward motion to a better place in my life. 

But with each of the decisions, I've found inner confirmation that I am following the path I need to be on. 

One of those decisions was to be a part of this performance. 

I was chosen to share the message of the gospel with the solo part of the song 

Nothing Compares to this. Which at first was exciting, then as the performance 

closed in, caused me so much stress that even today the stress triggered, adrenal fatigue is awful. 

But it was a message I really do believe. And I am thrilled to have been a part of the delivery of that message. 

Nothing compares to that moment of mercy so rich and so real

How could I ask for more?

And with the encouragement of the choir and director, both performances were very filled with glimpses of His glory. 

So Jones Chapel Choir and support crew, I thank you for allowing me to be a part of this message. It was a beautiful experience.

Besides --- look  --- I got to hold Baby Jesus - how cool is that? 

I found a recording of the song on you tube. 

This is not our performance, but it is a beautiful video and the arrangement is identical to the one we used. 

Take the time to really listen to the words

the entire Christ Story in just a few minutes of worship. 

Because really 

Nothing Compares to This.

Merry Christmas my friends. 

My wish for you this season. 

Love - Grace - Peace - Joy

Please take the time to quietly worship and remember. 

Then stand in awe and spread the news.

Christ is come

Come to the manger and see. 

Then come

Come to the cross and be free. 

Overwhelmed

Monday

Desk flowers

after a Sunday that left me overwhelmed with emotions

Piedmont Praise Group led our musical worship Sunday Morning.

Just Beautiful

A lady in our church - dementia has taken parts of her memory and personality

She lives with her daughter

Has very few moments of clarity

But I was witness to one.

As the praise group began a beautiful version of Silent Night

She broke into the song with them. 

The tears that had threatened all morning

Found the break in the dam and spilled. 

Nancy - sitting there by me 

Spilled her tears too. 

A God moment. 

A moment of thanksgiving. 

Praises sing. 

The tears were threatening anyway.

Because of a conversation I had on the way to church. 

I love the way these trees keep their leaves until the spring growth pushes them off.

When the breeze stirs them it sounds like papers rustling and I have often called that sound "paper lace"

I was looking at these all through the undercanopy of the trees and asked if he knew what kind they were.

Beech trees was the answer. 

Then I described my version of the sound. 

Doesn't sound like an emotional discussion at all huh?

Then he said water oaks keep their leaves too. 

And when they fall they make a clicking sound. 

Yes they do. 

I've noticed.

Even in the quiet, the forest has a soundtrack.

And someone else hears that same soundtrack too. 

Think about it.

-the rustle of birds landing on a branch

-the chatter of squirrels running through the trees and leaves.

-the lack of sound of an owl in flight

-a fish jumping with a resounding plop on the water

-the silence of walking out in a snowfall.

I'm in awe of recognizing that God gave us multiple ways to experience His creation.

I'm in awe of discovering that someone else is aware and willing to share their observations with me.

Yes is was a very good morning. 

my name is Mama

Warning --- this could easily be one of those trigger type of posts. 

see those two up there. 

my girls. 

My beautiful girls

Here is the trigger part 

I LOVE THEM SO MUCH

THEY ARE MY HEART

but 

I AM NOT THEIR BEST FRIEND.

and I do not think that parents need to be the best friend of their children.

we need to be PARENTS

Parents teach.

(doing it for them does not teach)

Parents discipline.

(discipline sometimes means a spanking)

Parents do not allow rudeness

(towards anyone)

Parents do not allow a feeling of entitlement

(nobody "OWES" you anything "just because")

Parents do allow consequences to play out

(you cannot pay them our of everything)

Parents give them unconditional love.

(yes even in the midst of the consequences that are happening) 

Parents let them go.

(the hardest thing to ever do)

Parents swell with pride when they make good choices.

(Mine have made some wonderful ones)

Parents celebrate victories

(had bunches of these too)

Parents cry over failures

(had some of them)

Parents hide those fears and watch carefully

(just in case)

Parents answer the phone

(and listen and celebrate and cry and and and)

Parents prepare for nightmares

(financial and otherwise)

(not being prepared will bite you)

Parents breathe thanksgivings when the nightmares don't occur.

(been there done that)

Parents show them God.

(not just tell them about Him)

Parents pray

(and pray and pray and pray)

Parents do NOT need to be best friends with the children

(they need those friends away from you) 

I have those two up there. 

Both adults.

We are slowly becoming friends. 

But mind you ---- I am not their best friend.

Not now.

Not ever. 

We may become really GOOD (even GREAT) friends.

and that would be a celebration thing.

Here's the truth.

I am Mama now

I will always be Mama.

I am proud that I am their Mama. 

I watch other parents and see them try to be best friends.

And in my mind - I always think - when is that child going to learn to wash her own clothes?

be still my heart......

She's 20. He's 8. 

My daughter. Crusty Old Guy's Grandson. 

He wanted to hang with Miss T at the art market and, of course, Miss T was completely ok with that.

He's easy to have around. 

And My spot for the market was his favorite.

Right under the VERY easy to climb crepe myrtle tree. 

Took him seconds to be headed up that tree. 

Oh and he happens to LOVE Abby. 

Her caption from the instagram post  above was 

"He shared his candy cane and we became best friends"

She's a beautiful young adult.

But still has the playful heart of a child. 

So when he climbed that tree. 

She simply climbed on up too. 

And we all laughed and smiled and teased one another. 

And simply had a beautiful time. 

My life is so freaking FULL of absolutely beautiful moments. 

And now I take the time to absorb them. 

To really LIVE them.

AND be THANKFUL for them.

Then try so hard to record them. 

See - the recording is important. 

We are quite human. 

We will forget.

Unless we give ourselves the means to remember. 

So here - I've recorded a beautiful three hours. 

of people who love one another. 

and how they laughed and played and built memories. 

on a damp cold day in November 2013. 

and in these moments we ALL were really 

LIVING AND LOVING. 

and that 

my friends

is a beautiful thing. 

CRITICAL

Unedited.

Right off my phone. 

The baby is absolutely wonderful.

She is my nephew, Tyler's little one. 

RhileyAnne. 

Happy, easygoing, alert, just beautiful. 

Goodness, how I love littles.

I could not wait to get my hands on her. 

to coo, and tickle, and listen to her little baby squeak noises. 

then i look at the picture 

AND

There is Mama T. 

at first the little voices said.

look at the chinS. 

look at ALL that grey.

Wrinkles ---check those out too. 

Oh and those reading glasses - perched on my head so I can keep up with them.

Why the crap do we do this to ourselves? 

Why do we zoom in on the stuff we see as negative?

Why do we measure ourselves again some unrealistic something? 

So I tried to look again -

This time with eyes that were a little more gentle with the interpretation of details.

And I was able to see. 

A thick thick head of hair that I love being long enough to pull up when I can run. 

or can feel a loved one get a hand in (Rhiley did just that - holding onto a tendril as we snuggled up - and that is a wonderful feeling)

Eyes lit up as I gazed into her eyes. 

Wrinkles forming little laugh line grooves. (laughter is so good for the soul)

Look how I am smiling. Genuine. Open. Honest. 

And that tiny hand on my face. 

When I think about that, I can still feel it. 

I've seen people who post a lot of "selfies"

Often those people make me feel like "hey check me out, I look so good" 

I don't feel that about myself at all.

But I am learning to tell my critical eye to look again.

To see that I really am very happy. 

And in my mind.

I'm making peace with the image on the screen.

This is something we ALL need to do.

Like that person in the picture

and in the mirror. 

Sound in if you like --- but only about how you are silencing the critical voice that says you're not good, pretty, thin, muscular, ------------enough. 

tell me how you are happy with the image in the mirror or on the screen. 

Blessing lists

I keep a list of gratitudes.

You know what.

It's wrong to keep blessings a secret.

No matter what the reasons are.

God cannot be magnified if his blessings are "hidden under a bushel"

Just a few thoughts that occurred while I was reflecting tonight.

I've made serious mistakes in my life. Yet God chooses to continue raining down goodness and beauty in my life. I'll celebrate even the tiniest of things to be grateful for.

Things like this - he sent me a spider web glistening in the sun.

It is a beautiful thing.