As 2015 closes ---- a look back

My youngest graduated from college.

She moved to New York.

I am so proud of the young woman she is becoming.

My oldest daughter moved from an apartment into a house.

She had big breakthroughs in her research projects.

She gave credit to the good Lord.

I am so proud of the young woman she is becoming. 

Me. 

I have struggled.

Stopped.

Regrouped.

Stumbled.

Got back up.

Started over.

It has been a tough year.

I took lots of beautiful photographs. 

the one above a favorite.

I made lots of projects (finished a few from the past as well) 

And as difficult a year it has been for me (and a certain Crusty Old Guy),

I continue to proclaim

LIFE IS BEAUTIFUL

Photo above courtesy of Molly.

I am a survivor. 

Although I no longer wear that necklace 100% of the time. 

Why? Because I no longer have to remind myself anymore. 

I have gained some weight back. 

How? Enjoying the hell out of life beautiful.

Taking the time to eat dinner with friends.

Or solitude by myself. 

But then came the end of year commitment that I made to Molly.

I may have continued some over indulging on eating, but I honored the agreement to run a half marathon for my 50th birthday. 

Hardest thing I have ever done voluntarily.

But I did it. 

I trained.

I was ready.

Cancer scans first though.

Good news - you don't have cancer.

Bad news - there is a blockage in your kidney.

untreated leads to dialysis and ultimately transplant. 

I have no time for that. 

SO 

I scale back my actual  half marathon approach

run it a little slower than planned

still - I finished in under 4 hours (my personal goal) 

and to protect my kidney through the run. I drank extra and was careful about staying as hydrated as possible. 

3:44:27 

one kidney 

cancer survivor twice

facing surgery when this is all over.

makes me pretty badass I think. 

then surgery.

stent placed. 

follow up. 

didn't work

do over

second surgery

another stent

pray this one works.

today finds me recovering from two kidney surgeries in two weeks

hopefully not facing a third. 

I hate anesthesia

I hate pain meds

I hate being a singular kidney person

I didn't ask for this. 

and today finds me realizing that I can hate it all I want to

But I still have to walk this path. 

Because the alternative really sucks

it also finds me re-committing to be as healthy as I possible can. 

I'll be eating better

exercising better

stress relieving better (this is the biggest reason for my weight gain)

the stress affects the adrenal function negatively. 

because life really is beautiful and I got no desire to stop participating in proclaiming that fact. 

And I am sure there are gonna be some really great moments to collect in the coming year. 

So look out 2016 --- Progress is the word --- this one could shake some people's world

2016 approaches ----- one word 2015 recap

I chose SEEK as my word for 2015.

These words described various things I would seek 

I will SEEK 

better health

better living

more beauty

ways to accomplish goals

better relationships

more grace

more strength

growth

I will seek purpose

joy

time

kindness / and ways to be kind

Opportunity to be generous

wisdom

SO many things to SEEK

And I sought and I found. 

I ran my first half marathon - that was grueling. But I trained hard and I met my goals to complete it. 

Nothing like your daughter meeting you at the finish line to drape your medal around your neck. 

I took literally thousands of stunning photos.

I directed a wedding and gave the bride some special moments.

I sought opportunity to give - share - love. 

It has been a full and beautiful year. 

Here at the closing of the year, a medical issue came to light. 

After losing a kidney, I have to be very proactive on taking care of my remaining one. 

Scans show a blockage.

So we dealt with that and now I am on the road to that recovering.

And I made decisions that made others unhappy with how I dealt with this.

But you know what - I never felt alone this time.

That was one thing I sought as well - improved relationships. 

As 2016 approaches I have been pondering my word for the year. 

I think it will be 

PROGRESS

I want to see progress in my life.

I want to see progress in simplifying.

I want to see progress in my health 

I want my relationships to show progress. 

My health

My faith

So much potential.

So PROGRESS it will be. 

The photos are mine.

I hit the Jones Chapel parking lot at just the right time for those last two. 

Brilliant morning light just kissing the steeple. 

I love this image. 

I love my life.

It is quite beautiful every single day.

Looks like I have made some PROGRESS already.